From 1976 through 1981 I spent my summers working in Denali National Park, Alaska so every spring would see me driving north from wherever I'd wintered. In the spring of 1978, weary of the long drive on the unpaved Alcan Highway, I took the Alaska State Ferry from Prince Rupert, BC to Haines Alaska; from there it was another 20 hour drive to my summer home.

The ferry docked in Haines at about 9 AM and I was soon on the road. After leaving Haines, the highway passes through the extreme northwest corner of British Columbia, Canada, then through the southwest portion of the Yukon Territory before re-entering Alaska.

There isn't a lot of traffic on the road at this time of year, so when I saw a Sooty Grouse standing on the road I stopped in the roadway to try for some pictures. It took only a minute or so to set the camera up with a 300mm lens, but once the camera was ready and I looked up, there was no sign of the grouse. While getting the camera ready I'd had enough peripheral vision that I would have noticed if he flew off the road, so I thought maybe I'd gotten too close and I couldn't see the bird over the hood of the car. I backed the car 10'... no bird. Another 10'... still no bird. Mystified, I turned the car's engine off and got out. At this point the bird ran out from under the car and attacked my feet, biting my pants, slapping me with his wings, all the while muttering "wwwukwukwuk" with all his might.

I looked at my lens, minimum focus 13', looked at the feathered fury at my feet... this won't do. Switching back to the normal lens, I managed a few photos without serious injury. Several pictures were of the bird's primary weapon about to take a chunk out of whatever it contacted. The side view above is about as far away as the bird would allow.

Perhaps the bird was territorial. Maybe it was rabid, or had a bad case of cabin fever. Whatever the cause it continued the attack for another 20 minutes after I put the camera away. I reminded myself of the long drive ahead, and got back in the car. The grouse jumped in the car with me and kept attacking!

I now had to formulate an escape plan. One scenario I envisioned was jumping into the car and slamming the door... but what if the door caught the grouse? And even if I got in the car with the grouse outside, it would run back under the car and attack the tires... driving off... squish. I didn't wish the bird any harm, I just wanted to go away. I'd been training for a half-marathon so I figured "I'm buff, I'll go down the road a ways and dash back to the car, leaving the grouse in my dust." What I had forgotten is that grouse, in common with all galliformes (chickens, turkeys, pheasants, quail), have sprinter's flight muscles.

I'm not sure what prompted my thinking next 'cuz I knelt down to shoo my attacker away with my hands; he then jumped onto my knee and attacked my coat. At this point my frustration got the better of me and I just picked the bird up with my hands, thinking "If I were hungry, you'd be in BIG trouble". This is when another car came by, the first I'd seen since the battle began. "Opportunity! I'll transfer the bird's attention to these other people and I'll be on my way!" but apparently they knew about springtime grouse. They smiled, waved, and before I could sic the bird on them they were gone.

"Game over" I told the bird. "I've got a lot of driving to do today". I tossed the grouse over a roadside snow bank, six times, then he was gone except for the memories and a few pieces of Kodachrome.